SINCE THIS WEEK IS NATIONAL INFERTILITY AWARENESS WEEK WE HAVE PICKED A WORD FOR EACH DAY TO FOCUS ON AND BRING TO LIGHT. THESE WORDS WILL REPRESENT A STRUGGLE OR EMOTION THAT WOMEN DEALING WITH INFERTILITY MAY BE FACING. IT IS OUR HOPE THAT THESE WORDS WILL RESONATE WITH YOU. MAY YOU FIND ENCOURAGEMENT BY HEARING SOMEONE ELSE’S EXPERIENCES OR BETTER UNDERSTAND WHAT YOUR FRIENDS/FAMILY MIGHT BE GOING THROUGH.
Day 2 : Waiting
How do we wait? How do we learn to wait? I once heard a child say... "Waiting is Hard, Mommy!" Amen!
I agree waiting sucks. Waiting for the only thing you so desperately desire and long for is HARD. But who said potentially becoming a mommy would be easy? I know, Day 1 was all about only seeing pregnant women everywhere you look - been there - yes it's so true it's like an infestation of bellies, babies and bottles - like a scary movie on slow mo. All we see is what we WANT. What they so "easily" have that we don't have or can't seem to keep.
Thanks to infertility we are in this “not so desired” club of waiting and know just how “not easy” it can be to become a mom.
Want + Can’t Have = Jealousy
I’ve heard a bizillion times that “jealousy or comparison is the thief of Joy”. HOLD UP. The last thing we need is more joy stealers in our already weary minds. My infertility friends - choose to fight. Choose to fight the battleground of your mind. It will help in your waiting. Fight with scripture against “those thoughts” like Day 1 showed us.
In today’s culture, we know that no one wants to wait; not 5 minutes from now and definitely not for my deepest desire. But I want a baby Now! Waiting is an element of time and God the Father and Creator is not contained by time. He is above all of time. Time is but a glimpse or a speck within the forever of an eternal viewpoint. I remember a speaker once said, “Our struggles are but a 5 minute marker on His timeline within heaven.” Interesting. So if my long struggle of waiting for a baby is but 5 minutes to Him, then my waiting really is temporary. “My life is …. but a speck or mist,” (James 4:13-15). So then, if it’s temporary, does my waiting matter? YES oh dear one, yes. Just because you are called (like I was) to a season of waiting - it does not mean He does not love you or that he loves someone else more by not making them wait. Don’t believe this insecurity and lie. The No’s, Not Yet's and Wait you are experiencing do not equal punishment from God. Period.
Even Noah in Genesis 6 had to wait 150 years from the time God told him to build the ark until the time the floods actually came. Wow! That amount of waiting gives our waiting a different perspective.
Waiting is God ordained.
If I can think of it as temporary and a short 5 minutes, then with the Lord my heart can get through yet another 5 minutes right?
"WAIT for the LORD; be strong and take heart and WAIT FOR THE LORD." Psalm 27:14
So “they” say this is only a season, a journey, a phase, but I know it doesn’t feel like it. When you are in it, it feels like forever regardless of whether your season of waiting has been for months or years. Within infertility it is all amplified and feels too long. Somedays, it even begins to feel like a long forgotten path - where I lost the map, key, guide, direction, focus and God forbid myself along the way.
Maybe you can relate. Maybe I’m hitting a nerve. So if this is only a season of waiting. How do I wait? How do I wait within my hurts, longings, feelings of desperation, loss and frustration to be able to see an end?
You wait with trust (day 3), in purpose (day 5) and hope (day 6) of the Truth of God. Knowing your God, the God of all creation (Genesis 1), He will not forsake you or leave you (Deuteronomy 31:6). He is near to the brokenhearted and He cares (Psalm 34:18).
Oh sweet friend, the Lord cares intimately and tenderly for you.
Do you believe that?
I’ve seen in my own life and our own story during numerous miscarriages and losses as He lovingly covered me. In my waiting I clung to Him and He tenderly made beauty from what I felt like were ashes of despair. He is the God who can and will make all things new. In His Timing it is and will be Perfect.
God will come through. He will deliver on His promise. He will make a way, even if it doesn’t look like what we think or want it to look like. But He is always about working all things out for our good and ultimately His glory. We must remind ourselves of God’s promises. That if we rely on Him, and come to a place where we believe that even if our deepest dreams, desires don’t come or happen in the way or timing that I think they should… You are still God… and if I have you I have Everything I need!
"For everything there is a SEASON, and a TIME for every matter under heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1
Do you hear in this verse that in everything you are going through, He cares? This is your temporary season dear one. Claim it, accept it. Everything is in His time and it is under Him.
“Be Still in the Presence of the Lord, and WAIT Patiently for Him to act.” Psalm 37:7
All over scripture it reminds us to wait on the Lord, that takes patience on our part. Patience is trusting God to keep His promises in His perfect timing. Even in the midst of your season of waiting will you choose to see it is God ordained?